40 Years of Misery!
The Life and Times of Stephen Toll Stragnell

Now that I was a happily married man with two young children, it became clear that I was going to have to start earning some serious money. Clearly, the quickest way to fame and fortune was to follow the path of the professional athelete.

My first attempt was to break into the world of professional pool. It had all the qualities I was familiar with - smoke-filled rooms with plenty to drink - I was sure I would make it big.

Unfortunately, I never did make it to the big table.

Then I thought I would have a go at water skiing. As you can see, I was pretty hot stuff but for some reason the Olympic selectors passed me over.